So, I was slowly getting used to my new home. There were so many fascinating new things around me — things I desperately wanted to chew, nibble, or simply eat. Sadly, my attempts were met with a resounding “No!” every time. But hey, I’m quick and agile! I knew I could outsmart my new human if I tried hard enough. Spoiler alert: I didn’t. My human seemed to age about five years in just a few days. Strange, huh?
Now, let me be honest: I really liked being at home. It was warm, cozy, and full of potential chew toys (apparently, they call them “furniture”). Going outside? Yeah, not my thing. The hallway in front of the apartment? Nope, smelled weird. The elevator? Absolutely not. A tiny metal box that moves? Sounds like a trap to me.
I came up with a brilliant plan: pee right by the front door and rush back to the safety of the couch. A perfect strategy, right? Wrong. Apparently, humans don’t love indoor puddles. So instead, I was hauled into that dreaded elevator over and over again. Up and down, up and down — it was like some twisted theme park ride. Honestly, I think I aged five years, too.
And then there was the world outside. It was big, loud, and full of strange smells. There were other dogs out there, too! Some looked like they could be fun to play with, but I kept hearing this thing about “not being fully vaccinated.” No clue what that means, but apparently, it’s why I couldn’t join their games. So instead, I watched them with my best sad puppy eyes while pretending I totally wasn’t interested. (I was.)
Eventually, I realized this new world might not be all bad. There were leaves to chase, random sticks to steal, and my human always seemed to have tasty treats hidden somewhere. Maybe, just maybe, exploring wasn’t the worst idea.
But let’s get one thing straight: The elevator? Still a trap.